The Beautiful Marshmallow

When I tally up my assets, money is never at the top of my list. My asset list includes my health, relationships, experiences, and of course the magnificently inspirational animals I’ve had the good fortune to share my life with.

Back in March, my husband rescued a bunny from the UCLA campus. She was a precious little white fluffy cotton ball. We can only guess that some idiot abandoned her on campus because she was found frightened, alone, and under a bush surrounded by a big pile of rabbit pellets. When he brought her home, we immediately fell in love. Any plans to adopt her out quickly went by the wayside.

I’ve had lots of dogs and cats over the years but never a bunny. What an adventure she was! We named her Marshmallow. She hopped around and would playfully terrorize the cats. Speed the turtle welcomed her as well. They loved her and she loved them. Everyone got along perfectly.

There was so much to learn about her. What kinds of foods a bunny eats, how delicate they are, and how they like to play were just a few of the wonderful things we learned about the wonderful world of rabbits.

Six weeks into our rabbit adventure, our beloved bunny suddenly passed away. One evening her appetite diminished and we immediately took her to the vet. The vet who we normally saw was unavailable so we ended up seeing a vet who wasn’t really a bunny expert even though he claimed to be. Unfortunately she was horribly diagnosed. A necropsy later showed she died of complications of pneumonia. We were with her as she took her final breaths and her little tiny soul ascended into heaven to take her place with the angels.

Every time an animal companion passes away, a huge hole is left in my heart. Sometimes the pain is so intense that I don’t’ know if I will ever feel whole again. But time is the best medicine. Time has a way of healing us even if we never completely heal; time makes it a little easier to deal with your loss.

The past few weeks have felt empty to me. Our little Marshmallow is now our spirit bunny. I miss seeing her beautiful white fur and luminous pink eyes. I miss petting her soft fur and the way she tickled my toes. I know she is still with us in spirit but I miss her physical presence.

It’s been hard to do much the last couple of weeks including blogging on this site. Sometimes you just have to take a break and heal and not put pressure on yourself to do all those things you think you should be doing. Sometimes you just need to mourn and reflect.

When her ashes were returned to us, the Rainbow Bridge poem was included. I love this poem. I’m sure you have read it before but I think it’s worth sharing again. It’s good to be reminded that we will one day be reunited with all those animals who have made our lives so fabulously wealthy.

The Rainbow Bridge

There is a bridge connecting heaven and earth; it is called the rainbow bridge, because of its many colors. Just this side of the rainbow bridge, there is a land of meadows, hills and valleys with lush green grass.

When a beloved pet dies, the pet goes to this place. There is always food and water, and warm spring weather. The old and frail animals are young again. Those who are maimed are made whole again. They play all day with each other. There is only one thing missing. They are not with their special person who loved them on earth.

So each day they run and play until the day comes when one suddenly stops playing and looks up. The nose twitches, the ears are up, the eyes are staring. Then this one suddenly runs from the group.

You have been seen, and when you and your special friend meet, you take him or her in your arms and embrace. Your face is kissed again and again and again, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet.

Then you cross the Rainbow Bridge together, never again to be separated………….

Louisiana Christmas Fireworks

I think the great livers, the people who are fully self-actualizing and alive, are the great givers. ~Mark Victor Hansen

Let me start out by saying that I absolutely love Christmas! What I don’t love is the over-commercialization and pressure to buy lots of stuff that we don’t really need. Now, I’m not insinuating that everyone should be happy with only a candy cane and tree decorated with homemade popcorn garlands. I am suggesting that much of what we buy is the result of pressure from advertisers who tell us that if we truly care about our loved ones we will shower them with the most expensive gifts possible. One only need watch a jewelry commercial during this time of year to understand what I mean.

I’m not against gift giving by any means and I think that if someone one wants to honor someone with a gift that’s great. Giving gifts is an act of love and a wonderful gesture to let someone know that you care about them. Since gift giving is a ritual that is probably not going away anytime soon wouldn’t it be great if a massive movement changing the way we give gifts started to evolve? What if we started recognizing each other with gifts that helped those less fortunate than us? Most of us have enough chotchkes to last a lifetime so what if we took that $20 we might normally spend on a scented candle or decorative ceramic figurine and spend it to help a less fortunate person or animal instead?

A Christmas without gifts might seem a bit foreign to some. How does one celebrate without gifts you might ask? It’s easy. Think of all the holidays you don’t buy gifts for and how you always have a great time anyway. Do you exchange gifts at Thanksgiving, Halloween, 4th of July, or Cinco de Mayo? No we don’t and we don’t lack because of it, right?

Over the past few years I have drastically downsized my gift giving with family and friends. Not having to fight the hustle and bustle of shopping crowds has made the holiday season so much more enjoyable for me and I don’t find myself in the red come January. However this year I have decided to spend a little extra money on charitable donations. There is so much need right now and I want to do what I can to help. So many organizations do such great work but they desperately need money to continue their missions.

This year I will be giving a little extra money to my favorite animal organization and my close family and friends will receive a beautiful card (on recycled paper of course) that says a donation has been made in their name. Animals are so precious and they do not have a voice so it’s up to humans to advocate for them. We all share this planet together and that means we must each do our part to ensure that all species have a chance at a comfortable life. By giving my money to help them I help out humans as well because animals bring  joy to so many people’s lives.

Charitable giving doesn’t only mean non-profit organizations but individuals as well. Perhaps you know someone who is having a hard time and could use a little help not to mention cheer this holiday season. Why not put a gift card for a local grocery store in the mail and send it to them anonymously? If they have children, you can prepare a special basket with small toys and books and leave it on their front porch when they’re not around. Another idea is to go shopping with a friend and buy a needy family some basics like clothing and food. There are many organizations in every community that can give you the name of a family that needs help and they can also let you know exactly what they need.

This is the time of year after all when millions of people celebrate the birth of a man who taught compassion, sharing, and love. Let’s honor him by practicing these virtues.

My outdoor cat colony-Monkey is the gray one on the left

Animals are such agreeable friends – they ask no questions, they pass no criticisms. ~ George Eliot

Those who know me well know that I love animals with all my heart and soul. My animal companions have made my life so much wealthier. It has been a privilege to care for the animals I have been lucky enough to know. They have also been some of my best friends. I cannot imagine my life without the company of animals.

My husband and I currently have three in-door cats and a turtle. We also feed a small colony of four feral cats that live in our front yard. The colony started out as six cats. My friend/neighbor Dawn and I humanely trapped them and had them spayed and neutered. We then released them in our neighborhood where they could live their lives in peace and celibacy! Because none of the cats had ever had human touch contact they were not good candidates for companion pets. It is our belief that all animals deserve the chance for a decent life so we feed them religiously and take the responsibility of caring for them very seriously.

Someone once said that dogs have owners but cats have staff. They were spot on! Dawn and I have served as staff for these wonderful kitties for the past ten years. When my friend Maddy moved into the neighborhood several years ago, she became one of their staff as well. Did I mention that the three of us also serve on the staffs of our indoor felines as well? The indoor cats are really demanding and they don’t even pay us!

One cat in the colony disappeared early on and we never knew what happened to him. His name was Creamy. Another became sick and we were able to once again humanely trap him and take him to the vet. He had a fatal kidney disease so we had to put him down. His name was Simba and we were very sad when we lost him. The colony has held steady at four cats for quite some time-Monkey (the male of the bunch) and three females-Popcorn, Misty, and Georgie.

All four show up every evening for their wet food buffet and of course dry food is always available on my front porch. A couple of weeks ago I noticed that it had been two days since I had last seen Monkey. He always showed up like clockwork for the wet food. All four little four-legged darlings always patiently wait for me to bring out trays of mouth-watering dishes like Friskies Classic Pate Mixed Grill or Turkey and Giblets. After a couple of day of not seeing Monkey, I got super concerned. I was afraid he was ill or had been hurt.

When the kitties aren’t hanging out in my front yard they are usually hanging out in the backyard behind me. A very eccentric woman who decorates her trees and plants with pastel colored ribbons has always been very kind to them as well. She feeds her own outdoor cats and leaves out extra for our little group. Her backyard is overgrown with bushes and plants and in general it’s just a mess. For the cats however, it’s a paradise!

A week went by and still no Monkey. I took several walks in my neighborhood looking for him and even visited the eccentric lady’s yard to see if I could find him. Still no sign. I prayed he would return safely. I even sent telepathic communications to him asking him to please make his presence known to me. Maddy and Dawn were keeping an eye out for him as well. Again, nothing.

This past Monday at dusk I took another walk. I went by the eccentric lady’s (sorry, I don’t know her name) house again to see if I could spot him in her yard. No sign. I continued on my walk. I was getting ready to head back home when something told me to go back by her house again. As I was walking in the house’s direction I noticed a couple tending their garden in the house next to hers. Something told me to talk to them. I told them I was looking for a grey kitty with a mustache and fluffy tail who I had been feeding for several years.

The man and woman looked at each other and their face’s suddenly turned sad. He then told me he had found a grey kitty fitting my description ran over in the street a little over a week ago. Someone had put a trashcan next to him in the street blocking off the area so no one would further run over his body until he could be picked up. I was touched that someone respected Monkey enough to do that. The man told me that shortly afterward he had been removed. They said they were so sorry and I knew they felt horrible for having to give me such heartbreaking news. I thanked them for letting me know. Although it was a relief to have this closure, a small part of me died and I cried all the way home.

Life seems so empty this week without Monkey. I can only hope that he went quickly. I hope he knows that he was loved by so many people in our neighborhood. I hope he knows how much joy he brought to my life and how much I loved him and still do. I have lost many animals over the years and you would think it would get easier. It never does.

I still have fantasies that maybe Monkey is still around. After all I’m not 100% sure it was him. Unfortunately, my gut tells me it was because he’s nowhere to be found. I miss him showing up on my porch everyday. I miss his fluffy tail going back and forth and him coming up to the window to visit my in-door cats. He loved being the only boy and hanging out with the girl kitties in the front yard. He was quite the little lady’s man.

I dreamed of him the other night. It was as vivid of a dream as I’ve ever had. He suddenly jumped onto my porch and meowed at me. “Monkey,” I called out “you’re alive!”  Then I suddenly woke up. At first I was disappointed because I realized Monkey was not alive. Then it dawned on me that he was. He most certainly was. He visited me in my dream to let me know that although he had changed form, he was alive and well and would always live forever in my heart. Rest in peace and be free my dear Monkey kitty. I’ll see you again one day on the other side!

David on the hiking trail in Topanga Canyon

“For you wake one day, look around and say, somebody wonderful married me”.

~ Fred Ebb

David and I celebrated our wedding anniversary this past weekend. I am lucky enough to be married to one of the world’s best guys and each year with him just gets better and better. So when David asked me what I wanted to do for this year’s anniversary, he willingly agreed to my vision of celebrating our special day without breaking the bank. Finding creative ways to live a rich life without spending tons of money has become a sort of game for me. I don’t agree that money buys happiness and I’m always looking for ways to enjoy life that don’t depend on my financial situation.

Associating frugal with a wedding anniversary may sound sacrilege to some. After all we have been conditioned by the media to believe that such landmark occasions must include money and lots of it. Dictionary.com defines frugal: as economical in use or expenditure; prudently saving or sparing; not wasteful. As I work to become less wasteful in all areas of my life, the wedding anniversary celebration is no exception.

Last year we were in Costa Rica on our anniversary and celebrated at an amazing restaurant. (The Chilean Sea Bass was to die for and I still salivate when I think about it.) Fast forward to this year. I’m still unemployed so we decided it best to forfeit our previously hoped for trip abroad this summer. Instead I started to look into all the great things our local area has to offer. After all, we do live in a vacation destination and too often we take the sights around us for granted.

So what did we end up doing you might ask? We spent a day hiking in Topanga Canyon, CA. For those unfamiliar with Topanga Canyon, it is a mountain community in Western Los Angeles known for its bohemian culture. It’s the perfect place for hiking, biking, and horseback riding. It’s one of our favorite places. If it wasn’t for the long drive down the canyon to get to work we would love to live up there. Oh well! Maybe one day!

The drive up the canyon to Topanga State Park was beautiful. We could have parked on the back streets and walked to the trails but David insisted we pay the $10 parking fee because he wanted to support the parks. I agree it’s important to give back to our parks so I agree the $10 was well spent. We hiked down the Santa Ynez Trail which was supposed to take us to a waterfall. Going down was very pleasant and beautiful. Of course the waterfall was dry but the last time I hiked this trail it was dry as well. We got a good laugh out of that. Going back up was not so pleasant because you guessed it – it was all uphill! Even though we were hot and out of breath we had lots of laughs and David jokingly warned me I had better not pass out because he would not be carrying me back up the trail.

We finally collapsed in the car and turned the air conditioner on full blast. We had tentatively planned to eat at one of my favorite Mexican restaurants in Topanga, but we were a hot and sweaty mess. Topanga is one of the world’s most tolerant places but I didn’t want to push the envelope by patronizing a restaurant drenched in sweat. We went home instead and did something we rarely ever do. We had pizza delivered! The rest of the evening we viewed free shows from Hulu.com.

Earlier in the week David asked me what I wanted for a gift. I told him I wanted a jewelry box. He immediately said we would go out and shop for one. No, no, no I said! Not being much of a jewelry girl, I don’t have that much jewelry anyway. All I wanted was some kind of box to organize what I did have because I was tired of it all being a loose mess in my bathroom drawer. I told him there was no need to go out and spend money when I was sure he had some sort of box he wasn’t using that would be perfect for organizing my jewelry. He ended up finding a gray looking cash box that he once used to store his check receipts. Since he no longer needed it, he offered it to me.

Now I know most women might find this kind of gift downright insulting but it was perfect for me. First of all, he honored my request. Second, he “shopped” in his own home and found something perfectly good that was no longer getting any use. Third, we spent no unnecessary money, and fourth and most important, it was environmentally friendly. We didn’t contribute to more demand in the world for useless objects that use up the world’s precious resources. Most of us have so much junk anyway and if we get creative there’s often no need to always be buying something new.

I doubt any of the mainstream women’s magazines would glamorize our anniversary celebration but for me it was just perfect! We spent time with each other and laughed and played. After all, it’s all about the experience and enjoying each other. You don’t need money to enjoy each other’s company. You either do or you don’t. Thinking that spending money is the only way celebrate special occasions is the ultimate in status quo thinking. David and I have never been very status-quo so why should any of our celebrations be so?

Back in April, I posted about the Random Acts of Blogging Event.  Several of us female bloggers were to use the same blog post title and on our assigned day we would commit one senseless act of kindness for a total stranger – then blog about it.  The beautiful and talented Jill aka the Duchess of The Duchess Guide organized  this very lovely event. 

By the way, if you’ve never had the chance to check out her website and the good work she is doing, please do so. Jill is one of the most wonderful souls on the planet. She is not only drop dead gorgeous on the outside but she’s equally if not more beautiful on the inside.  She’s all about supporting and being of service to other people, so when she organized this event, I was not surprised.

Well, here’s my story about my random act of kindness for the week.  I really wanted to do something fabulously wonderful like helping up a little old man or lady who had fallen down on the sidewalk or maybe rescuing  someone who had fallen into a pool.  Maybe someone would be short a couple of dollars in the grocery store line in front of me and I could offer to give them a few dollars. Thus, nothing big and dramatic crossed my path. So as the week progressed, I realized that it’s the small things we do for others that add up and make the world a little better place. Each time we do something kind, no matter how small, we raise the vibration of the planet and in turn raise our own frequency.

My week was made up of small acts of kindness. There was the runaway grocery cart in the Trader Joe’s parking lot that was about to hit someone’s parked car. I started to run and grabbed the cart just before it crashed into someone’s vehicle and possibly caused some body damage.  The owner of the car will never know I did this or that such episode even happened but I felt good knowing I saved someone the hassle of a dented car. I then took the grocery cart back to the proper place which in turn saved an employee from some extra work. There was the lady in her big old gas guzzling SUV that was trying to merge into a very busy traffic lane. Why not let her in and make her day I thought. I did so and she waved and seemed very grateful. I was especially mindful to be as kind as possible to as many drivers as I could this week. Driving is stressful for all of us and sometimes we make stupid mistakes. I know I do. It’s nice when someone gives you a break and helps you out.

I may not have made the difference of a Mother Theresa, Ghandi, or Martin Luther King Jr. this week, but I hope my kind acts inspired others to pass the kindness along and do something nice for another person. I encourage those reading this to find one random act of kindness that you can do for a stranger this upcoming week. It will make you feel incredibly high, I promise!

For more inspiration, check out some of the websites below. These gals are also posting today on their random acts of kindness. They also have really great blogs so you just might find a new fun blog to follow.  Be kind everybody!

Red Said

Blissful Seed

That Happened to Me

Andree Belle

Plush Palate

Louisiana Sunset

The moment you have in your heart this extraordinary thing called love and feel the depth, the delight, the ecstasy of it, you will discover that for you the world is transformed.
~Jiddu Krishnamurti

Two types of economies exist in our world today. There is the “outer economy” which is the one we fixate on the most – money, bartering, loans, jobs, stock markets, interest rates…..  The second type of economy is what my friend Darice likes to refer to as the “inner economy.” This economy is the more powerful of the two and the one we often forget to focus on because we are so disproportionately concerned with the outer economy.

What exactly is the inner economy? Your inner economy is that part of you that is abundant no matter what your financial situation. Having a strong inner economy helps you look at life from a different perspective. You know your life has value and meaning whether you are in times of outer economy bust or boom. An inner economy is measured by your health and peace of mind. It’s the time you spend with family, friends, and animal companions. There are no limits when you have a strong inner economy. Inner economies don’t fall prey to competition and material resources. Scarcity and fear based human made rules don’t affect your inner economy unless you let them. A strong inner economy prepares you for whatever life sends your way.

I have little control over the outer economy. It is obviously very broken and a big fat mess!  Yes, there are some (mainly the corporate media) who are trying to desperately convince people things are starting to turn around but personally I have my doubts. I don’t mean to be a “Debbie Downer” but I’m not buying this “things are beginning to get better” nonsense. Yes, I know some people like the Wall Street Bankers and defense contractors are doing very well. On the opposite end of the spectrum there are still 8 million plus people unemployed and wages for the most part are stagnant.   In my book, the economy is not working until everyone is prospering.

“No person left behind” is my new slogan. And I’m not just talking about the U.S. but every being on the planet-humans and animals.  It’s mind-blowing to me how in the 21^st century greed can still run so grotesquely rampant. You would think we would have evolved a bit as a species, huh? The multinational corporations and banks will continue to have their way until the collective consciousness wakes up and we demand a world that works for all and not just a select few. Pretty soon the world’s resources will be depleted and it won’t matter who has the most zeros after the numbers in their bank account.

How do we start waking up? How do we demand change? We do so first by focusing on our own inner economy. We work on our own transformation of consciousness. Of course we all have to exist for the time being in our current system but we need not give it any more power than absolutely necessary.  On a practical level we can boycott the large banks and move our money to credit unions and local banks. We can buy local products from local businesses when we have the opportunity. We can start focusing more on our relationships with people instead of constantly consuming unnecessary goods and services.

On a more spiritual level, we can go inside and work on changing ourselves. We can focus on unconditional love and compassion for all beings. Because you know what?  The world is a reflection of all of us and the time is ripe for a radical mind revolution in each and every person. Remember, we can’t change a thing until we change ourselves.

Me with my Valentine Flowers and Shylo in the foreground stealing center stage

I had a wonderful three day weekend. Yes, even unemployed people look forward to three day weekends and Fridays as well!  We jobless people do a mammoth amount of work during the week-looking for work, housework, soul searching work, etc…

Saturday was a gorgeous day and I savored the red velvet cupcake my friends dropped by on Friday night. A better description of the “cupcake” might be a big slice of cake, as it was enough for two people. Red velvet cake is not a dessert I would make own my own so it was quite a treat!

Of course Valentine’s Day was Sunday. I’ve had several conversations with friends over the last few days about how people seem to be scaling back this year for Valentine’s Day.  People seem to be spending time together as opposed to having a “buy fest”. As one of my friends says “Every day is Valentine’s Day when you’re in love!”  I like this statement. Maybe it’s one reason why David and I have never gone all out on Valentine’s Day with expensive dinners, pajama grams, bouquets of expensive flowers, and Godiva chocolates. It’s a fun day but every day is special with David.

We woke up on Sunday morning and he make me breakfast. I then reciprocated and made a decadent shrimp casserole that evening. That evening we watched reruns of CSI.  No romantic classics like “The Way We Were” or “When Harry Met Sally” for us! No Sir-ee! We like watching the Vegas crime lab team secure and investigate a murder scene, perform autopsies, and decipher DNA coding. It was a great Valentine’s Day! Spending time with the love of my life and watching crime shows. We’re such a great match!

Monday, was President’s Day and David had the day off. I got up and went to an early morning yoga class. When I got home, David had a beautiful bouquet of roses waiting for me. He bought several bunches of flowers and arranged them himself. The kitchen looked like a messy floral shop, but I didn’t care. My flowers were beautiful. I’m not one to get excited over jewelry and other extravagant gifts, but flowers get me every time.

In addition, he bought me dark chocolate and a tiny stuffed dog which the cats are afraid of but are warming up to as I write. I had mentioned to him earlier that flowers would be nice but we are watching every penny we spend so I didn’t completely expect him to come through. But he always does, he always comes through for me. At times it seems this holiday is nothing more than a Hallmark driven over-commercialized holiday. But at its core, it’s well meaning and the perfect time to splurge on little luxuries and say I love you to the one we love the most. If splurging on little luxuries is not in the cards for you, then splurge on time spent with your significant other. Like my friend says, “Everyday is Valentine’s day when you’re in love.” May we all carry the spirit of Valentine’s Day with us throughout the year!