Tornado damage in Tuscaloosa, Alabama

The tornadoes that swept through the South this past week made me seriously reflect about the things that really matter. Needless to say, material belongings are not on that list. Neither are houses because houses are not what make a home. What matters goes far beyond anything we could buy or display for the world to see. I don’t care how expensive the item or how many generations it has been in your family, material possessions are ephemeral. They are vulnerable to the whims of nature and numerous other factors beyond our control.

How must it feel to lose everything? One minute you have all the comforts of your possessions around you and the next moment you look around and it’s all gone. Think of all those people who woke up last Wednesday morning and how they had no clue that their lives would drastically change in a matter of seconds at some point later that day. Think about this for a little while. Let it sink in. What would it feel like to have nothing left?

I grew up in Alabama.With the exception of one brother and his wife who lives in Atlanta, all of my family is still there. Birmingham and Montgomery to be exact. I know what it’s like to get that dreaded warning that a tornado is on the way. I have spent many a night with my family and childhood dogs sitting in hallways and waiting for tornadoes to pass over us. It was commonplace to have tornado drills at school and it was not unusual to sit in the school hall when it was for real. You don’t have time for anything except gathering up all the living beings around you and taking cover. No time to think about what do I want to save. You don’t care, you just want to make sure you survive and pray that there won’t be much destruction.

I’m happy to report that most of my family came out of this tragedy unscathed with nary an injury or loss of anything material. I do have an aunt and uncle who lost one of their greenhouse farms but no one was hurt and they will bounce back on their feet in no time.

My brother emailed me and said that he knows it sounds like a cliché, but seeing the tornado’s destruction in person is indescribable and devastating. President Obama said something similar. He went on to say that he understands better why the Bible says to store your treasures in Heaven, because the material stuff down here is worthless. Worthless indeed. What matters is our families and friends and the good times we tally up during this short time on earth.

The New York Times featured an article a few days ago that is well worth the read. It’s about a man who returned to Birmingham just hours after he lost his home. The article says “He worked through the warm day, not a cloud in the sky, and into dusk, well aware that others in this state were mourning their dead. Sweat-stained and flecked with sawdust, he occasionally looked up to see his wife and his two children in their altered yard, working, making new memories. His house nearly destroyed, he felt blessed.” I know what he means. I think we all do.

(If you’d like to read more about changing the way you think about wealth please consider reading my book REDEFINING THE MEANING OF WEALTH: DISCOVERING PROSPERITY AND FORTUNE IN THE UNEMPLOYMENT LINE.)

The New York Times has featured an article a few days ago that is well worth the read. 

My mother's simple yet elegant Christmas dinner table

As a young girl I loved reading the Little House on the Prairie books by Laura Ingalls Wilder. I was especially fascinated by how they simply yet joyously celebrated Christmas each year. Their financial resources may have been limited but that didn’t stop them from celebrating to the fullest. The Ingalls didn’t spend weeks shopping for gifts for each other or planning the perfect holiday soiree. They focused more on spending time together and participating in fun frugal activities like baking gingerbread and making cranberry and popcorn chains to trim the tree. The family would gather around the fireside and read the Christmas story from the Bible. Gifts for the children were stockings stuffed with an orange, hard candy, and maybe a special doll or toy.

The simplicity of a prairie Christmas is still appealing to me as an adult. I may not be able to emulate the exact way the Ingalls celebrated the holidays but I can come up with my own version of a simple Christmas. Too much pressure is put on us to have the perfect holiday festivities and buy the perfect gifts. Trying to meet these expectations takes the fun out of Christmas for me and makes the season seem superficial and sacrilegious.

Simplifying the holiday is a process. Each year you better figure out what are the most meaningful activities and rituals you cherish most. You might find that cooking is where you want to put your energy or you may decide that going all out with decorating your home is what you enjoy best. Simplifying is not about deprivation but keeping those traditions that enhance and make the holiday season most meaningful to you.

Keep in mind that many people may not understand your desire to simplify the holidays. Many people are used to the commercialized way of celebrating and are not going to understand for example why you no longer display the blow-up Snow Man on your front lawn. But that’s ok because there’s nothing simple about trying to pressure others to conform to your ways. People will change when they are ready if they ever change at all. For those of us who want to simplify the holiday season, the best we can do is come up with what works best for us. If they follow-great! If not, then we can hope we lead by example.

Several years ago when I first began my quest to get away from the material aspects of Christmas and focus on the true meaning of the season, I was met with a bit of resistance. For example some of my friends and family wanted to continue with gift exchanges so I suggested we set a limit on what we spent. The next year I suggested consumable gifts or gift cards. Eventually some were even game to opt out of gift exchanges altogether. Instead we would spend time together at a local restaurant or going to a special event. I think people were actually relieved to have one less gift to buy. I’m not completely against gift giving and I think people give gifts with the best of intentions. However, I now feel that I have enough of everything I could possibly ever want and spending money just to spend money does no one good in the long run. I now take the money I would have spent on gifts and give it to those in need.

I’m not going to give you a list of what you should do to simplify the holidays because I don’t know everyone’s individual situations. My husband and I don’t have children so obviously our holiday will be celebrated quite differently than someone who has three kids who are anxiously awaiting Santa’s arrival. Below are some of the things we do in our household to simplify the holidays and enjoy them to the max. I’d be interested to hear what you are doing this year to simplify so please feel free to share.

• My husband and I do not exchange gifts. Since we travel to see family every year at Christmas, we spend our money on airline fare and eating out at good restaurants. This year we travel to Baton Rouge and we have many favorite eateries we will visit. New Orleans is not far away and their cuisine is some of the best in the world. We also go to Natchez, Mississippi for a few days-more wonderful southern food!
• We don’t exchange gifts with siblings or friends. We do however buy our parents a present and our young nieces and nephews a small gift like a book or some art supplies.
• I’m in charge of the decorations and I like to keep it very simple yet elegant. I hang a live green wreath with a big red bow on the front door and set out lots of red and white candles throughout the inside of our home. I take a large glass vase and fill it with some of my tree ornaments and place it in the middle of my dining room table surrounded by greenery. I would love to have a small tree but so would my feline companions!  Enough said, huh?
• Just because I don’t go all out with the decorations doesn’t mean I don’t love them. Since there are people far more talented than me when it comes to decorating, I prefer to go riding around the city and look at their creativity.
• I love Christmas music and play it around the house and in the car from Thanksgiving until New Years. Mannheim Steamroller’s Christmas collection is my favorite.
• We no longer send out Christmas cards. I do love them but my husband and I have become more concerned in the past few years about our environmental footprint so we choose to forego them.
• We make a donation every year to our favorite charity. I get the most reward from this because this is what the season is all about!

Beautiful Fall Day in Japan

A hug is a great gift – one size fits all, and it’s easy to exchange.  ~Author Unknown

Time flies! Can you believe it’s almost Thanksgiving? Black Friday, that day following Thanksgiving when US shoppers officially begin their Christmas shopping is also just around the corner. Shopping the day after Thanksgiving has never been my scene not to mention getting up at 5am to stand in line for a deal on a flat screen TV is not my idea of a day off. Plus I really don’t think Christmas is about shopping till you drop.

There’s nothing simple about shopping for the sake of shopping. Just because advertisers tell us this is the day to shop doesn’t mean we have to. We can create our own traditions that have nothing to do with excessive consumerism and spending money on items we or our loved ones don’t really want or need. For those of you like me who prefer to do something a little more creative, a little more fun, and a little more relaxing, check out my 21 Black Friday alternatives below. And of course please feel free to add any others you might have as well.

1. Volunteer. Although most of us don’t have to work the Friday following Thanksgiving there are many places that are open such as hospitals, homeless shelters, animal shelters, etc… and they would welcome your help.
2. Sleep In. Most of us have the day off so why not sleep in a few extra hours. What luxury, huh?
3. Make Friday a movie day and watch some movies you’ve wanted to see. If you plan ahead you can check out some DVDs from your local library or rent from Netflix or your local Redbox.
4. If the weather in your area allows it get out and enjoy the great outdoors. Take a hike or a bike ride.
5. Clean out a closet or drawer. Get rid of things you no longer need and start the holiday season feeling lighter and less burdened by material possessions.
6. Get out your holiday decorations and throw out any you no longer like or use. Keep those decorations you really love and begin your holiday decorating early. Make a special hot drink to enjoy while you “deck the halls.”
7. Read a book. Is there a book you’ve been dying to read but haven’t had the time? My favorites are mysteries and this is the perfect weekend for a “whodunit?”
8. Have a friend over for coffee and have a long leisurely visit. Catch up and laugh a lot.
9. Black Friday is a great day to start or finish an arts project. Do you like to knit, paint, or sew?
10. Get out the holiday music and start enjoying it. Before you know it the holidays will be over so why not enjoy all that beautiful music as much as you can. My favorite song is “Do you Hear What I Hear?”  and I can’t wait to start hearing it nonstop for 5 weeks straight. You think I’m kidding but I’m not. I love Christmas music!
11. Play board games with your family and/or friends.
12. Bake some more goodies. Tis the season for sweets and this time of year is a great excuse to indulge.
13. Write a letter to someone. There are still people out there who would love to receive a handwritten letter in the mail. I bet you know just the perfect person in your life who would appreciate this.
14. Play with your kids.
15. Play with your pets.
16. Write. Most of us have the writing bug at some time or another. Start that short story, poem, or novel that is just aching to be put down on paper.
17. Take a long soak in the bathtub.
18. Call a friend long distance and shoot the breeze.
19. Go introduce yourself to your neighbors if you’ve never met them.
20. Clean your house. Enjoy the rest of the weekend knowing your cleaning is done for the week.
21. Do nothing. Be spontaneous and enjoy not having to be anywhere.

Summer Flowers

God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today.  Have you used one to say “thank you?”  ~William A. Ward

Cultivating gratitude in our competitive and overly-materialistic culture can at times be difficult. We are constantly being bombarded with advertisements and messages encouraging us to want more, more, more. Being thankful for what we have can be hard work if our spiritual chops are not up to the task. It’s easy to get caught up in worldly thinking and feel less than because we didn’t get that job promotion or can’t afford the latest luxury techno gadget.

Many schools of thought say that cultivating gratitude is an important step in creating more abundance in your life. Although I agree with this statement, I don’t necessarily believe that the abundance received will always be in the form of money or worldly success. Abundance can mean many things such as peace of mind, good health, or nurturing relationships just to name a few. You can’t put a price tag on these treasures.

The last few weeks have been tough for me. I feel overwhelmed by a big project and I’m working on I’ve been mentally and physically tired as well. It’s easy to start focusing on all that is wrong instead of all that is right. I want to live my life in a state of thankfulness and appreciation for the all the blessings I have. Peace of mind and balance are what I crave most. Why do these things sometimes seem so difficult to achieve? Sometimes I think raising a million dollars might be easier than cultivating a still and quiet mind. But I keep trying as I think it’s a goal worthy to pursue even if I never get there.

As the new week begins, I reflect on the wealth in my life. It’s a pretty long list actually. No, it wouldn’t impress Wall Street but Wall Street’s idea of wealth doesn’t exactly impress me either. My health, my faith and spiritual life, my husband, my family, my friends, my pets, my yoga practice, and of course the absolutely gorgeous southern California weather are all on my wealth spreadsheet. It’s the usual list but what a great list, huh? It makes me wonder why I ever even strive for more. When I sit back and give thanks for all my wealth my mind suddenly becomes quieter and more peaceful. If I could only stay in this place all the time!

Louisiana Sunset

The moment you have in your heart this extraordinary thing called love and feel the depth, the delight, the ecstasy of it, you will discover that for you the world is transformed.
~Jiddu Krishnamurti

Two types of economies exist in our world today. There is the “outer economy” which is the one we fixate on the most – money, bartering, loans, jobs, stock markets, interest rates…..  The second type of economy is what my friend Darice likes to refer to as the “inner economy.” This economy is the more powerful of the two and the one we often forget to focus on because we are so disproportionately concerned with the outer economy.

What exactly is the inner economy? Your inner economy is that part of you that is abundant no matter what your financial situation. Having a strong inner economy helps you look at life from a different perspective. You know your life has value and meaning whether you are in times of outer economy bust or boom. An inner economy is measured by your health and peace of mind. It’s the time you spend with family, friends, and animal companions. There are no limits when you have a strong inner economy. Inner economies don’t fall prey to competition and material resources. Scarcity and fear based human made rules don’t affect your inner economy unless you let them. A strong inner economy prepares you for whatever life sends your way.

I have little control over the outer economy. It is obviously very broken and a big fat mess!  Yes, there are some (mainly the corporate media) who are trying to desperately convince people things are starting to turn around but personally I have my doubts. I don’t mean to be a “Debbie Downer” but I’m not buying this “things are beginning to get better” nonsense. Yes, I know some people like the Wall Street Bankers and defense contractors are doing very well. On the opposite end of the spectrum there are still 8 million plus people unemployed and wages for the most part are stagnant.   In my book, the economy is not working until everyone is prospering.

“No person left behind” is my new slogan. And I’m not just talking about the U.S. but every being on the planet-humans and animals.  It’s mind-blowing to me how in the 21^st century greed can still run so grotesquely rampant. You would think we would have evolved a bit as a species, huh? The multinational corporations and banks will continue to have their way until the collective consciousness wakes up and we demand a world that works for all and not just a select few. Pretty soon the world’s resources will be depleted and it won’t matter who has the most zeros after the numbers in their bank account.

How do we start waking up? How do we demand change? We do so first by focusing on our own inner economy. We work on our own transformation of consciousness. Of course we all have to exist for the time being in our current system but we need not give it any more power than absolutely necessary.  On a practical level we can boycott the large banks and move our money to credit unions and local banks. We can buy local products from local businesses when we have the opportunity. We can start focusing more on our relationships with people instead of constantly consuming unnecessary goods and services.

On a more spiritual level, we can go inside and work on changing ourselves. We can focus on unconditional love and compassion for all beings. Because you know what?  The world is a reflection of all of us and the time is ripe for a radical mind revolution in each and every person. Remember, we can’t change a thing until we change ourselves.

Tiny hummingbird in nest outside my neighbor's house

I’m a firm believer that abundance is for everyone. It’s our birthright from the time we take our first breath until the time we take our last. And I for one am also expecting a great deal of abundance in the afterlife as well.

The same way I feel everyone has talent and creativity, everyone has something in their life that is abundant. There are different forms of creativity and there are different forms of abundance. I don’t care how much money someone has or doesn’t have – no one has a monopoly on abundance. Just because Bill and Belinda Gates have more money than they know what to do with doesn’t mean they are any more abundant than you or me. And I bet they would be the first to tell you this is true.

www.dictionary.com defines abundance as:

1. an extremely plentiful or over sufficient quantity or supply
2. overflowing fullness
3. affluence; wealth

Any innuendo possibly referring to money is not even mentioned until the third definition.  Although abundance can mean money, it also means so much more. What do you have an abundance of in your life? Love, friends, family, laughter, fun?

I have an abundance of joy lately. You would think that going on month 6 of unemployment would be getting me down a bit. Miraculously, it’s been the exact opposite. Not that I don’t from time to time worry about the future and money, but I’m finding abundance in so many other areas.  I have more love in my life than is probably legal, thanks to my husband, friends, family, and pets. I have an abundance of time to read, write, and exercise. I get plenty of sleep every night and I haven’t caught any of the nasty flus or colds that having been going around the past several months. (Knock on wood!)

I have every faith that I will be taken care of and abundance will continue to be mine.  When I do enter the fear mode, I remind myself of the advice Jesus gave to his disciples. I hope you find his words as empowering as I do.

²⁵“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? ²⁶Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? ²⁷Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life^?

²⁸“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. ²⁹Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. ³⁰If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? ³¹So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ ³²For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. ³³But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. ³⁴Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matthew 6:25-34 (New International Version)

Sunset over The Hollywood Hills

One thing that never ceases to amaze me, along with the growth of vegetation from the earth and of hair from the head, is the growth of understanding. –Alice Walker

It’s been almost six months since I was laid off from my previous job which translates into six months of reduced income. As I reflect back on this past half year, I realize my situation is turning into a great voyage of self discovery because I’m learning things that are making me a stronger person both spiritually and emotionally. More importantly, I’m finding out that I’m a very wealthy person no matter what amount of money I’m making. As I learn to define wealth in new ways, I’m taking it one day at time, accepting change, and welcoming new experiences. Some of my reflections on this are below:

Taking It One Day at a Time

I find life a bit easier when I take it one day at a time. Whenever I start encountering fears about whether or not I will ever work again or being evicted because we can’t pay rent, I’m reminded of Scarlett O’Hara’s famous quote in Gone With the Wind –

“I can’t think about that right now. If I do, I’ll go crazy. I’ll think about that tomorrow.”

Now I don’t mean to sound irresponsible but worrying will not make anything go away or get better. Every day I acknowledge that I’m ok for today and I wake up the next day and repeat the process. I’m learning to live in the now and not worry about worst case scenarios because chances are they will never happen. And if they do, well I’ll deal with them when they get here.

Accepting Change

The only constant in life is change. It’s the one thing I can always count on and my situation will continue to change many times going forward. Sometimes it will be good and sometimes it will be bad. It’s all just part of the process and the more I can roll with what life sends my way, the more accepting I can be of the things I have no control over.

Every day, something around me changes. Whether it’s the increase in the price of food at the supermarket or a natural disaster, I have no control. What I can control is how I accept the change going on around me. I don’t have to like it. I may even work to change it, but I have to accept it and feel it before I can move on. Whenever the feelings I encounter seem to be a bit much, I keep in mind the phrase “this too shall pass” and you know what? It does!

Welcoming New Experiences

Every experience in life teaches us something new and contributes to who we are as people. Being unemployed is just one experience in the many more that await me in this life. I can get upset about it or I can see it as a way to grow. I have no idea where I’m going or what will happen to me. Some days I worry what the future will bring and I feel uncomfortable. However, I’m learning to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. It’s part of being human. Who are any of us to think that life will always be easy and cushy?

So for now, I’m keeping it simple. I have the basics covered- a place to live and food to eat. I’m in love, I’m healthy and I have great friends and family. For today, my needs are met and I am just fine!

Sunset over Redondo Beach, CA

Anything simple always interests me.  ~David Hockney

For those of you who aren’t familiar with the The Simple Living Network, I highly recommend you take some time to check out this great site. You won’t regret it. If the idea of slowing down and simplifying your life is appealing to you, the wonderful resources on the The Simple Living Network will help you do just that!

I came across this site several years ago and have found the articles, book recommendations, and links to other resources invaluable. After hiding in the background for several years, I recently took the plunge and joined the discussion forums and I’m having a blast. It’s a great community and so inspiring. I love knowing there are others
out there like me because it helps keep me focused and on track.

Now don’t confuse simple living with poverty or deprivation. Simple living is a lifestyle choice that allows a richer inner life through a simpler outer life. Like wealth, simple living can have many definitions as well. There are no rules when it comes to living simply. One person’s idea of simple living might be to pare down to as few possessions as possible while another person’s definition  might be planting a food garden in their backyard.

My personal definition of simple living is cutting out the things in my life that no longer serve me or the greater good of the planet. By keeping it simple, I stay focused on those things that enhance my life the most. I’m also much more mindful of my consumer choices and how they affect the environment, because I want to do my part in treating Mother Nature the way a lady should be treated.

Before I was introduced to the concepts of simple living, I always felt disorganized and rushed. It seemed like I never had any quality time to myself.  Being the ultimate people pleaser, I was always accepting invitations out of obligation when what I really yearned for was a few quiet moments alone to reflect and regroup.  I was always on the go and never able to fully enjoy the present moment. Then one day while browsing in Border’s bookstore on my lunch break, I found a book called Simplify Your Life by Elaine St. James. I found the whole concept of voluntary simplicity fascinating. Hungry for more ammunition to help me in my quest to take back my life, I started surfing the web for more information and that’s when I found The Simple Living Network.

Since I have begun this path, some of my results are as follows:

No Debt- One of the ways I did this was by taking the bus to work and freeing up the money I would have spent on gas and parking to pay off bills. Our household has still managed to remain debt free (with the exception of a car repair bill I blogged about a few months ago, but hey that’s almost paid off, thanks to simple living principles!)

More Time for my Interests-One example is Yoga. It’s my passion and I practice several times a week. It’s my priority so it takes precedence over shopping at the mall, attending social events I have no interest in, and lounging on the couch watching reality TV.

Quality Time with my Husband-My husband and I keep our calendars very simple so we can spend time with each other. We like hanging out together which is one of the reasons we got married! Our favorite time of the week is Friday night. We order take-out from our favorite neighborhood restaurant and watch paranormal or crime documentaries.  (Yes, we’re a bit twisted! )

Quality Time with Friends-Since I have cut back on activities I have no interest in, I have more time to hang out with my friends and family. We don’t have to go to a fancy restaurant or over-priced concert. I can have just as much fun going out for coffee, taking a hike together, or sharing a bottle of wine while sitting on my front porch.

Massive De-cluttering- I have thrown out so much junk over the last few years. I still think I have too much but it’s nothing like it used to be. Now that I have less, I can  now more fully enjoy what I do have.

Respect for the Environment-I have never been against protecting the environment but I used to think it was something I had no control over. I now know different. Each of us can make a difference. Owning a fuel efficient car, choosing walking over driving when it’s feasible, and recycling, are just a few of the many positive habits I have developed which are helping me lessen my footprint on the world.

A More Creative Life-I no longer feel I have to live life a certain way. I can create the life that works best for me and not what advertisers or the status-quo say are best.

I’m still simplifying my life. It’s a constant journey and I’m loving every minute of it.

Me-Just Happy to be Alive!

Society has conditioned us to believe our wealth is measured by money and material possessions. However, our real wealth and true net worth expand much further than the numbers in our bank accounts.  If we limit ourselves to a narrow definition of wealth, we will never be able to fully enjoy life and experience our true riches.

Our current monetary system produces a lack mindset and leads us to believe we must constantly be chasing the dollar if we want to be happy and content. Messages of accumulating more, more, more are constantly thrown at us, and as we strive for bigger and better, it’s often never enough. Our longings for more seem to go to infinity.  We think that if only we had a bigger house, a job making 20% more, a fancier car, then we would really be set. But then we find out nothing could be further from the truth.  Often when we do end up with more, we find that the void we thought would be full is still empty.

Our economy is in intensive care, and there is no clear indication of when things will be better.  This is the perfect time to reexamine our thoughts and ideas about wealth. How empowering is it to define your net worth by an outdated and dysfunctional money game that is rigged for an elite few and is constantly upping the ante for the rest of us? Although the current system is our reality for the time being, we need not give it any more power than is absolutely necessary. As we shift our thinking, we realize our true wealth is the things that money just can’t compete with or provide.

The list below outlines some alternative ways to tally up your real net worth, so review it and see how you measure up. I bet you are worth gazillions!

• Your Health-It may sound like a cliché, but your health is your greatest wealth.  If you feel lousy, it doesn’t matter how much money you have stashed away or how many summer homes you own. More importantly, if you have bad health, it’s harder to enjoy your other riches such as your friends, family, and passions. Don’t take your good health lightly. It’s one of your greatest assets. If you think not, then talk to someone who is suffering from a serious illness. Most people who are seriously ill see a bigger picture than those of us who are healthy. Learn from them and start to expand your perceptions of what’s important in life. Wake up every day and thank the deity of your choice for yet another day of good health.

• Your Mate/Partner-What a wonderful thing it is to spend your life with someone you love. Our deepest desires as humans are not really money or the material, but love. Remember when you first fell in love and how great you felt.  Having someone to go through the good times and the bad times makes the journey of life so much easier. It’s a real blessing to have someone special in your life, so cherish them and don’t take them for granted.

• Your Children-Children are priceless! Need I see more?

• Your friends- Families are wonderful but our friends are extra special because we choose each other. We have no control over who our families are, but all the control in the world when it comes to picking our friends. Friends are there to help you through bad times and to share the good times. And when we reciprocate by being there for them, the rewards are two-fold, because we gain the joy of having been there for someone as well. Good friendships allow us to be with people who accept us for who we are and are not forever trying to alter us.

• Your animal companions-Animals friends bring so much joy and fun to our lives. Besides the regular activities we participate in with our animal friends, just watching them as they go about their day to day lives can keep us entertained for hours. Animals teach us to live in the moment and not to fret about the past or worry about the future. Our animal companions are the epitome of unconditional love.

• Free Time- The gift of time to spend in any way you choose is an asset rivaling the most successful monetary investments. What a luxury it is to have time to spend with family and friends, time in nature, time reading and relaxing, time for fun, time for getting adequate sleep, and time to just do nothing if that’s what floats your boat.  The extravagance of time is definitely a valuable commodity and an often under-rated resource.

• Access to Modern Conveniences- The times we live in provide us with more access to technology and modern conveniences than ever before in the world’s history. You have a refrigerator, right? Access to a washer and dryer? What about a TV, computer, microwave, radio, electricity, heat, air conditioning, etc? Compared to past generations, most of us live like royalty. Modern conveniences save us time and make life a whole lot easier.
• Your Life Experiences-Each of us are unique and our life experiences make us who we are. Whether they are good or bad, we can use our experiences to learn, teach, and contribute to those around us. So if you aren’t already, get out there and purposefully start living. You’ll have setbacks for sure, but you will also have many victories as well.

• Your Spirituality-If you are a person who travels a spiritual or religious path, then you know the rewards — peace of mind, comfort, support, a connection with the divine. Spirituality is what feeds our soul and differentiates between the materialistic world and the world we cannot see. We all know deep down there is something more to being alive than just what is in front of us, but so often we forget and get caught up in things that won’t matter in the long run. Our spirituality helps us through the challenging times and keeps us connected to what’s important in life.

• Your Education- An education is not only a degree or certificate. Education is a skill you’ve learned, or a book you’ve read that inspires conversation and thought.  Whether it is a degree from a fancy university, a trade school certificate, or information acquired from the local library, all are forms of education and are very valuable. Once you learn something, it’s yours for the keeping and can never be taken away from you.

• You Humor- Laughter has a way of soothing the human spirit and making us whole again. If you have the gift of humor and have people around to laugh with you, know that you have an asset that can carry you through most anything this crazy life sends your way.

Christmas in Birmingham

I love the Christmas season. It’s always been one of my favorite times of the year. The festivities and hoopla of the holidays make winter’s arrival a bit easier to bear. By the time the New Year has arrived, I’m ready for a break and I actually look forward to the colder and lower key days that lie ahead. Each year David and I visit family. This year my family is up on the rotation schedule, so by this time next week, we will be in Birmingham, AL. I hope it’s cold but not too cold! J  My parents always have the outside of the house decorated with white lights and of course a beautiful tree inside. The foyer table hosts a beautiful nativity scene to remind us of the true meaning of the season. There will be scrumptious calorie-laden food and plenty of good drinks. Yes, we will all probably gain a pound or two (or ten) but who cares because January is the perfect month to work off the excessive holiday pounds, right?

In addition to all the traditions we participate in each year such as Christmas dinner, church candlelight services and friends dropping by on Christmas day night, we started a new tradition two years ago. Instead of everyone exchanging gifts in the traditional way, we now play the white elephant gift exchange game.  We set a $5.00 limit and we all end up with something silly, useless, and tacky! But oh what fun we have. I love this new tradition for many reasons. The main one being I no longer have to spend the holiday season in the malls spending money I really don’t have on a gift that’s probably not wanted or needed. It also takes a lot of pressure off of me to find that perfect gift.

It seems like so many of us today have a surplus of material goods and one more bath and body set, no matter how well intentioned the giver, is probably not going to mean that much. David and I have never really exchanged Christmas gifts so the holiday shopping gets easier and easier each year. Even my friends and I have changed the way we give gifts to each other. A box of candy or bottle of wine is just as nice. Some friends and I skip the gift giving all together and use the money to go out to a nice restaurant. I now have more money in my budget to give to a favorite charity which to me is an important part of the holiday season-helping those in need.

As the Christmas season becomes less and less material for me each year, I’m realizing I love the holidays more than ever. I feel much less stressed and I enjoy those around me much more. I’m not completely against gift giving, but I do think Americans have gotten out of balance over the years with the incessant gift giving. Yes, I know this is the time of the year the corporations, government, and Wall Street urge us to go into massive debt so we can still be paying off gifts we can’t remember in April, but consumer debt only enslaves us and benefits very few in the long run.

Christmas is a time to celebrate the life of a man whose main message was love and peace. It’s a time to enjoy family and friends, eat yummy food, listen to good music, and hopefully get a little rest and relaxation. It’s not about spending money you don’t have or money you should be saving. All around, I get a sense that many people are downsizing this year. I’m sure a large part of it is the economy, but I also think some of us are becoming more conscious of the things that really matter in life. We’re beginning to get our financial houses in order and simplify our lives so we can enjoy the blessings we already have without always striving for more. I hope the downsizing of the holidays is a permanent trend. We may all have a few less gifts to open each year but we will be richer in so many more ways.